How I help couples

In our first session, I learn more about how you operate together. I do this by asking questions; observing how you communicate in real time; and assessing what you do well together and what skills are needed for you two to be more effective and secure as a couple. Then, I discuss my findings with you, pointing out the things you do as a couple that help you work well together, and a roadmap of recommendations that would help you be even more effective. You two then tell me how you want to prioritize your treatment. My recommendations will help you build skills in one or both of the following areas: ​​

Safety and Connection

As a couple, I want to give you the skills and know-how to build the utmost safety and connection in your relationship. If there is conditioning or trauma that keeps you from actively practicing these skills, I help you process and de-condition these things as a team where possible. My training and methods span many therapeutic modalities, including PACT, attachment processing, Developmental Model, Brainspotting, brain science research, and more. Some things we can address around safety and connection include:
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• You trigger one another
• You want to explore ways of discussing and resolving differences
• You want to improve your physical intimacy
• You want more emotional connection
• One partner is more anxious about the connection, the other is more avoidant
• You both avoid conflict and don't yet know how to get beyond that​
• Partners have trouble understanding and working with neurodivergence in their relationship (like ADHD and Autism) 

Lasting Relationships

​Are you interested in protecting your relationships for the long-haul? I use PACT's principles of secure functioning to help you clearly identify your purpose as a couple and know why you are better together than apart. This can then inform the agreements you put in place to support one another and protect your relationship when life changes occur. Some things we can address around relationship longevity include:
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• One or both partners remain ambivalent about the relationship
• The agreements you have in place don't seem to stick
• You're considering marriage and want pre-marital counseling
• You have different ideas about what role friends, family, work, or other elements should play in your lives.​ 

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Time commitment

I see couples for 75-minute sessions, with the first session being 100 minutes. Most couples will see the quickest results if they come in weekly during the beginning and most active phase of therapy. As you start to meet your goals and see things improve, we can adjust the schedule accordingly for bi-weekly check-ins and less frequent tune-ups. How many sessions depends on how extensive your needs are and how quickly you make progress as a couple. 

Insurance

I am out-of-network for insurance and can provide a detailed monthly superbill for you to pursue reimbursement if you have out-of-network coverage.

Who I work with

I work with couples in the SF Bay Area at any stage of their relationship who are motivated and want to put in the work to have the best relationship they can. 

I work with partners who identify as straight or LGBTQ. Your relationship can be monogamous, non-monogamous, or something else. I am affirming of your gender, sexual orientation, and relationship preferences. 

Location

​My office is located at 3017 Telegraph Ave, Suite 330, in Berkeley. The cross streets are Ashby and Webster and it is directly across the street from a Whole Foods Market. Ashby BART station is about a 10-minute walk away and the AC Transit 6 line stops nearby.

The building is wheelchair accessible with gender-neutral bathrooms.

​There is metered street parking on Telegraph Ave and other street parking on Ashby, Webster, and other side streets.​

Why don't you offer couples therapy online?

While I would love to be able to offer my services to more people across the state, I've found that I working with couples in person is the most effective service I can provide. I have several colleagues I refer to who offer telehealth to couples. 

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